Anger
by BTRlover98
Summary: It's said that you're only really angry for four seconds. After those four seconds you can either easily get over what you were mad at, or you can keep thinking about it and force yourself to get angry again. You can either tell yourself that it doesn't matter and get over it, or you can be like me, and you can get your mind to think that you have to be angry. Ignore the bad title!


**Wow I've started so many random one-shots and just never finished them.**

**Hey if anyone out there is a twin and feels the need to vent about how their twin acts like a precious little angel to the whole world but then suddenly turns into a demon when she's only with you, and then she makes you mad so that when you try to tell someone about it, it makes you seem like you're crazy and it seems like your the demon, you can come and vent to me because guess what that's what my twin does to me.**

**Except I feel guilty for saying things like that about my twin sister because I love her a lot, but oh my goodness, she is so mean to me that I just want to cry, so yeah.**

**Anyway, sorry I just had to rant a little, but this is an idea I got from my own life (again.) I hope you guys like it!**

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Staring up at the ceiling in my bedroom, I thought about everything that happened in the past hour and a half. When I looked back on it, I felt a little bit of embarrassment. I knew I overreacted, but it was just hard for me not to. At the same time, however, I felt anger. Anger towards everyone. Towards my brother, my mom, and even myself.

I rarely ever got this mad at my family. We usually all got along pretty well. Occasionally, we would get in little fights, but after ten minutes, we would be over it. No one even needed to apologize. So why was I so angry today?

The afternoon started out completely normal. I got home from school around the same time my brother and his friends got home from work. We were all just sitting around after a long day, watching TV, eating snacks, everything we normally did. And I was perfectly happy.

That is until Kendall started teasing me and making stupid jokes like he often does.

Sometimes, when Kendall and the guys make fun of me, it doesn't affect me so much. I always know they're joking, so I don't mind it that much. But other times, it really does hurt my feelings. I know they never mean what they're saying, but I hear people talking about me at school almost every day, so sometimes I wish I could come home and not be treated the same way.

If the boys knew that kids teased me at school, then they would most likely stop teasing me at home. But I would never tell them that. Besides, it was never even that bad in school. But today, every time one of the guys would make a joke about me, I just got angry.

At first, it was funny. I was laughing it off, just like I always do. But after a little while, I was just getting annoyed. I tried really hard to let them know that it was bothering me; I basically told them straight up that it was.

"Guys, remember when Katie..." one of them would say, always finishing with something embarrassing I did.

"Can you guys just stop? It's not funny any more, you're just being annoying." I would tell them.

But they didn't stop. Only Logan did. He seemed to understand, but Kendall, Carlos, and James kept going. They thought I was joking. They thought they were being hilarious. And I knew it was just because they were being their stupid selves, just acting like boys. But it honestly was hurting my feelings.

I didn't like acting like a baby and telling on them, but when my mom finally got home from the store, I asked her to get them to leave me alone. But she agreed with Kendall. Of course she did.

"They're just joking around, sweetie. And knowing you, you probably started this fight," she laughed.

That got me even angrier. Kendall was, a lot of the time, a kiss-up. He was always the one to start fights, but since I yelled louder than he did, my mom always thought I started it.

So obviously, they continued to make fun of me, and I continued to get angry, until I finally punched Kendall's arm and stormed off.

And for the past hour and a half, the whole fight kept playing over and over again in my mind. I knew it wasn't a big deal; I shouldn't have gotten so upset. But I was tired of being the bad child, accused of doing everything wrong. I was tired of being constantly teased without anyone realizing that it can actually hurt my feelings a lot. I was tired of it all.

Suddenly, my view of the ceiling became blurry as tears filled my eyes. I kept begging myself not to cry, but I couldn't help it. I hated fighting with my family. I hated that I got so angry at them. I hated that I knew they were all out there talking about me. I hated feeling like this, but I couldn't help it. It just hurt, but no one else understood.

They were a whole group of older brothers, teaming up on the little sister. They didn't know what it was like to be on the other end, all alone with no friends, with no one else on my side. Not even my mom. They didn't know what it was like to be a girl, who could easily get upset sometimes. They just didn't know what it was like to me, and that was the worst part. They didn't understand. They didn't realize that they sometimes took it too far. And maybe they were okay with being teased like that. Maybe they could just laugh it off, but I couldn't, and every time I tried to explain that to them, they wouldn't listen.

And that thought made me cry a little harder. I felt the tears slipping down my cheeks as I rolled over onto my side and stared at the wall. No one would listen to me. No one would see my side of the story. I was always wrong about everything, no matter what, and I hated it.

It's said that you're only really angry for four seconds. After those four seconds, you can either easily get over what you were mad at, or you can keep thinking about it and force yourself to get angry again. You can either tell yourself that it doesn't matter and get over it, or you can be like me, and you can get your mind to think that you have to be angry. That there's no way you can get over what got you mad in the first place in only four seconds.

I hated that. It made me feel weak and stupid. I can't even control my own mind to stop it from getting so frustrated. But it seems like everyone else could. And I hated that so much.

My thoughts were suddenly interrupted when I heard my door open. I wiped the tears out of my eyes as fast as I could and turned around to see Logan at the door. "Can I come in?" he asked me, giving me a small smile. I sighed but nodded, rubbing my eyes again to try to hide that I was crying. Logan didn't say anything about it as he walked over and sat down on my bed. He remained silent, so I finally spoke up.

"What do you want?" I asked. "Because I already know I shouldn't have gotten so mad, and I know it was all my fault we were fighting, but-""Katie," Logan stopped me. "I'm not in here to tell you you did anything wrong," he told me. I raised my eyebrows in confusion. "I agree with you. Kendall, Carlos, and James were being pretty mean to you," he said.

I looked at him in disbelief. He wasn't actually telling the truth, was he? Why would he agree with me and not his best friends?

"And, I know I was being pretty mean at first too," he said. "And I'm really sorry. I didn't realize it bothered you so much when we teased you. But just so you know, we're all just joking around."

"I know," I muttered. "But just so _you_ know, it's never funny. It's annoying. Every single time you do it, it's just annoying. Maybe if you guys didn't do it so often and you didn't make so many jokes, it would be okay, but I hear it every single day, and it's not funny anymore."

Logan sighed, and I saw guilt swimming in his eyes. "I know, Katie, I know exactly what you mean. Those three make fun of me all the time, and I really do understand how annoying it can get," he assured her.

I narrowed my eyes at him in a mix of both confusion and anger. "If you know how it feels, then why do you do it to me?" I asked.

"Up until today, I never knew it bothered you," he defended. "I'm really sorry, Katie, if I knew you hated it, I wouldn't have done it."

I did remember that Logan was the only one to stop when I first asked them to, and I realized that maybe he was telling the truth. Maybe he really did know how it felt, and maybe he hated it just as much as I did.

"Katie, the guys can be real jerks sometimes," Logan started. I nodded in agreement. I loved them all, but sometimes, all I wanted to do was scream at them and tell them how annoying they were. "But I guess all I can say is that you have to try to ignore them," Logan continued. "They're too stupid to realize that what they're saying is mean, but at the same time, you should know that if they were smart enough to figure that out, they would never say it again. If they knew how much it really bothered you, they would stop."

"But I tried to tell them how much it bothers me, and they still wouldn't stop!" I pointed out. Logan smiled.

"That's probably because they're too stupid to realize that you weren't joking, too. And they probably never will notice," Logan said, shaking his head. "But trust me, you weren't overreacting. You had every right to get angry."

I nodded, trying to tell myself that he was right. "Do you ever get mad like this?" I asked.

Logan shrugged in response. "Sometimes, but I try really hard to ignore them or laugh with them when they act like this. But they do it to you more often than me, so I understand why you're so upset."

I nodded again. "It's hard to ignore, though," I said. "It really hurts my feelings sometimes," I said softly, tears filling my eyes again. Logan sighed, scooting closer to me and wrapping his arm around my shoulder.

"I know, Katie, but you just gotta try. Or if they're really bothering you, just walk away and try not to let it upset you too much," he told me. "I can always try to talk to them if you want," he offered. I shook my head.

"No, that's okay," I mumbled as I turned and hugged Logan. I was glad he came to talk to me. At least now I know someone understands, and I know that I'll have someone to talk to if this ever happens again. "But maybe when they're acting stupid like that next time, you can try to change the subject. And I'll do the same thing for you," I suggested.

Logan chuckled. "Okay, that sounds good."

I smiled. "Thanks, Logan. For stopping earlier and for coming in here," I said. "I'm glad I have at least one smart brother."

Logan laughed again. "Anytime, Katie."

**Ahh, I actually wrote this whole thing in one night and I'm actually kind of proud of it. I hope anyone who read this enjoyed it, and it would mean a lot if you could leave a review and tell me what you thought! Please! :) Thanks for reading, and I love you guys!**

**OH YEAH and vote for Big Time Rush and Carlos for the Kids Choice Awards because they really deserve to win this year! :)**


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